my taste
In the past, I thought I could get along with any tastes well as long as I made effort on it. I was wrong.
In the moment, I still believe I can handle all tastes but I have a strong preference over different tastes.
In the future, I hope I have a clear taste ranking and make a firm decision on my taste, choose directly to be surrounded by my favorate tastes.
As a Chinese foodie, I'm originally from the northeast part of China, where the taste mainly focuses on more salt with a little sugar. Chinese dishes is generally divided into four different categories by region. There is a huge number of different styles contribute to Chinese cuisine but perhaps the best known and most influential are Cantonese cuisine, Shandong cuisine, Jiangsu cuisine (specifically Huaiyang cuisine) and Szechuan cuisine. These styles are distinctive from one another due to factors such as availability of resources, climate, geography, history, cooking techniques and lifestyle.
I'm neither a spicy fan nor strong smell enthusiast. Chilli can add some hot favor to my taste but I can survive without it happier. I like to add some shallots, pepper, garlic and ginger into the traditional Chinese dishes. I am not a pure vegatarian which means I do like vegetables a lot while I also eat meat at a necesssary nutrition base. Among all kinds of meat, I have a preference of duck, beef, lamb, fowl, turkey, ham, sausage though nowadays I eat less meat compared with seafood. I like all types of seafood but my current favorate would be salmon. Shrimps, crabs, fillets and scallops are all very attractive to me. My favorate vegetable is cowpea from China, asparagus in US, avocado from Mexico. I like all kinds of fruits and my favorate now is kiwi. For the cooking techniques, I prefer braising and stewing to frying and decoctong. I like baking and is a big fan of Peking duck as well as hot pot.
I enjoy the original taste of all materials and seek the natural ingredients from all over the world. I'm open-minded to all tastes and willing to try new tastes under curiousity. However, my taste criteria has developed gradually as time goes by. I do follow certain rules when asked to judge certain tastes. It's hard to summarize those rules in a list since taste itself is a sense from the tongue and words seem not powerful to describe well. But I still like to mention some as a record of my current taste. They might change but up to now, these are my criteria. I like the rich deep taste which needs more time to digest. The taste feels like a breeze in the spring at the very beginning with not strong impressive taste but it lasts longer. The rich taste means it's a combination of a variety of different tastes coming either simultaneously or gradually one after another, not restricted to one single taste. The deep taste means it's accumulated intense in a manner that leaves memory of such taste hard to describe sometimes taste mysterious.
After I came abroad to continue studying, I realise the diversity of all tastes and feel cultural amazements from trying different dishes from all over the world. The amazing part is that sometimes there exist so many similarities while other times it's completely opposite in another attractive way. I think it takes a lot of time to learn well about different tastes and hard to make the decision on which taste suits me well. At this moment, I am still working on figuring out my taste but now I learn to narrow down the tastes to certain levels so that I don't need to worry too much about the endless trying. Taste is changing over time as well but as an econometrician, I always like to be a consistent estimator even uniformly.
Well, to be continued...
(Crystal at HOME April 1, 2016)
In the moment, I still believe I can handle all tastes but I have a strong preference over different tastes.
In the future, I hope I have a clear taste ranking and make a firm decision on my taste, choose directly to be surrounded by my favorate tastes.
As a Chinese foodie, I'm originally from the northeast part of China, where the taste mainly focuses on more salt with a little sugar. Chinese dishes is generally divided into four different categories by region. There is a huge number of different styles contribute to Chinese cuisine but perhaps the best known and most influential are Cantonese cuisine, Shandong cuisine, Jiangsu cuisine (specifically Huaiyang cuisine) and Szechuan cuisine. These styles are distinctive from one another due to factors such as availability of resources, climate, geography, history, cooking techniques and lifestyle.
I'm neither a spicy fan nor strong smell enthusiast. Chilli can add some hot favor to my taste but I can survive without it happier. I like to add some shallots, pepper, garlic and ginger into the traditional Chinese dishes. I am not a pure vegatarian which means I do like vegetables a lot while I also eat meat at a necesssary nutrition base. Among all kinds of meat, I have a preference of duck, beef, lamb, fowl, turkey, ham, sausage though nowadays I eat less meat compared with seafood. I like all types of seafood but my current favorate would be salmon. Shrimps, crabs, fillets and scallops are all very attractive to me. My favorate vegetable is cowpea from China, asparagus in US, avocado from Mexico. I like all kinds of fruits and my favorate now is kiwi. For the cooking techniques, I prefer braising and stewing to frying and decoctong. I like baking and is a big fan of Peking duck as well as hot pot.
I enjoy the original taste of all materials and seek the natural ingredients from all over the world. I'm open-minded to all tastes and willing to try new tastes under curiousity. However, my taste criteria has developed gradually as time goes by. I do follow certain rules when asked to judge certain tastes. It's hard to summarize those rules in a list since taste itself is a sense from the tongue and words seem not powerful to describe well. But I still like to mention some as a record of my current taste. They might change but up to now, these are my criteria. I like the rich deep taste which needs more time to digest. The taste feels like a breeze in the spring at the very beginning with not strong impressive taste but it lasts longer. The rich taste means it's a combination of a variety of different tastes coming either simultaneously or gradually one after another, not restricted to one single taste. The deep taste means it's accumulated intense in a manner that leaves memory of such taste hard to describe sometimes taste mysterious.
After I came abroad to continue studying, I realise the diversity of all tastes and feel cultural amazements from trying different dishes from all over the world. The amazing part is that sometimes there exist so many similarities while other times it's completely opposite in another attractive way. I think it takes a lot of time to learn well about different tastes and hard to make the decision on which taste suits me well. At this moment, I am still working on figuring out my taste but now I learn to narrow down the tastes to certain levels so that I don't need to worry too much about the endless trying. Taste is changing over time as well but as an econometrician, I always like to be a consistent estimator even uniformly.
Well, to be continued...
(Crystal at HOME April 1, 2016)
My experience
I have been waiting in Canada for an unexpected long period of over 60 days because of careless planning for further traveling. Now I’m back to track but this out-of-track experience does leave me a special memory. It gives me a deeper understanding of life and changes attitudes towards life.
Travelling in my view most likely refers to seek the world, all on your own, that is, neither with a tour guide nor under some workshops or groups. I’m not saying group travel isn’t fun but I personally find myself prefer to be in such self-travel. During my stay in Ottawa, I opened a travel blog. My first thought was maybe such a blog could help provide more information to those who would plan to visit in the future, but after a small accident of losing those “precious tips” I thought, which I wrote for two hours, I suddenly realized those were just my short-sighted perspectives of a city and only part of my not-so-sweet life experience.
The most precious thing I got is through the seeking and searching process. Once lost in a desperate mist, then find oneself in great joy. Maybe blank spaces offer more possibilities for others. Everyone has different opinions and more freedom generates more creativities. The meaning of life is to generate your own perspectives and create your own thinking. Relax, think and do.
I never realize I could be so firm and determined towards my dreams, especially during the difficulties. Families and friends have a strong influence on my life and I appreciate I am very lucky to have them. In a complete new country, as a foreigner to survive and adjust in a relative long period, a genuine love of my life and a strong curiosity of new stuffs help me catch my happy moments every day.
Travelling makes me feel how small I am in this world. Life is not easy and even the most optimistic person has the pessimistic moments. After days of walking and sleepless night, I once got almost hit by a car when I lost my thoughts in the road. I cried after I was away from the road and felt helpless in such an unknown world. However, I did blame myself for not concentrating. It wakes me up...
My experience increases with time and I'm telling myself every morning: today is a nice day! I have the dreams and will carry on!
Travelling in my view most likely refers to seek the world, all on your own, that is, neither with a tour guide nor under some workshops or groups. I’m not saying group travel isn’t fun but I personally find myself prefer to be in such self-travel. During my stay in Ottawa, I opened a travel blog. My first thought was maybe such a blog could help provide more information to those who would plan to visit in the future, but after a small accident of losing those “precious tips” I thought, which I wrote for two hours, I suddenly realized those were just my short-sighted perspectives of a city and only part of my not-so-sweet life experience.
The most precious thing I got is through the seeking and searching process. Once lost in a desperate mist, then find oneself in great joy. Maybe blank spaces offer more possibilities for others. Everyone has different opinions and more freedom generates more creativities. The meaning of life is to generate your own perspectives and create your own thinking. Relax, think and do.
I never realize I could be so firm and determined towards my dreams, especially during the difficulties. Families and friends have a strong influence on my life and I appreciate I am very lucky to have them. In a complete new country, as a foreigner to survive and adjust in a relative long period, a genuine love of my life and a strong curiosity of new stuffs help me catch my happy moments every day.
Travelling makes me feel how small I am in this world. Life is not easy and even the most optimistic person has the pessimistic moments. After days of walking and sleepless night, I once got almost hit by a car when I lost my thoughts in the road. I cried after I was away from the road and felt helpless in such an unknown world. However, I did blame myself for not concentrating. It wakes me up...
My experience increases with time and I'm telling myself every morning: today is a nice day! I have the dreams and will carry on!
my thought
People say misfortunes are treasures in life. I agree partially. Misfortunes do make me think more and deeper but I'm not sure they leads to a happy ending. The more I thought, the more scared, sorrow and uncertain I felt. I'm not being pessimistic but it's just that sometimes life is cold and cruel in an unbearable way.
It always tries to test the tolerance of people like a naughty kid. Sometimes it's right to let people suffer and develop patience but that's not always the optimal way of teaching everybody a lession. The class life teaches is marked with tears and bloods. Survivors are left at a certain level of sacrifice. It's true that we couldn't reach a goal without any costs but how to minimize the cost and improve the overall welfare? Why are there still some, or I should say any nonignorable amount of, people suffering?
I start to understand why some people are crazy, oh, no, there is no "crazy" word in my dictionary. Some people behave differently with reasons. Are they wrong? No. Most of them are just misfortune and such misfortune almost swallows their souls and minds. They need more care to be back from the lost. I saw people speak to themselves as if they were giving a speech to the air. I saw people beg and fight in an extreme manner as if it's the end of the world. I saw people lie on the ground partially buried in rubbish with unfocused eyes lost in the fast moving crowds. I have no idea what kind of stories happened to them but my tears are making my sight to the future blur. I'm lost in finding a proper way to help them.
I talk to myself sometimes when I walk on the street alone. I fight like a loud nonstopping terrier sometimes when I am treated unfair or misunderstood. I feel helpless, wander around sleepless sometimes. I saw people suffer and people change. It's a way of self-protection to adapt to the unexpected life. To help, I first need to understand how it happens. “All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.” Poverty might be one reason but should not keep causing troubles and make bad things worse. To seek the root, I still believe every baby is born good in nature like an angle. As time goes by, the surroundings change and they mimic to adjust. First they see things happen and learn how things work. They try to repond in their natural way and here comes the education. They learn from others in their life without thinking deep initially but they may question and ask why. Tens of choices are given in every second and sometimes need instant responses. Mistakes happen and some are not reversible.
The importance lie in the learning process and thinking procedure. When solving problems and learning from others, give some time to try to figure out how comes the problem and why they react like that. Don't simply mimic others with the reasoning of "They just did like that and I just follow". You are you and you have the right to make your own choice. Before making decisions, try to learn about the possible consequences well and there are different soources of learning everywhere but pick your preference and enlarge your vision by expecting the unexpected. Think twice when make any response that allows thinking time. Be prepared for situations that request instant responses and think about how to respond in advance. Don't ignore the small things that might make a big difference. Changing from yourself is the first easiest thing before you want to change others or even the surroundings. Gradually impacts are made.
Up to now, i still think chaos follow an unknown pattern in its own way. Nobody could take full charge of it but if everyone makes a small move simultaneously, then we can figure out the pattern we wish. I start to think the tiny small things I could do and start doing it now. I'm slow and prefer working hard in a gradual pace. I start to think of all ancient Chinese sayings and renew my understandings of the world. History has a great magical power and I start to think about it carefully again. I need to learn the rules, study the rules and improve the rules.
I will never stop thinking as long as I'm alive and once I think it thoroughly, I will try every effort to turn it into actions.
It always tries to test the tolerance of people like a naughty kid. Sometimes it's right to let people suffer and develop patience but that's not always the optimal way of teaching everybody a lession. The class life teaches is marked with tears and bloods. Survivors are left at a certain level of sacrifice. It's true that we couldn't reach a goal without any costs but how to minimize the cost and improve the overall welfare? Why are there still some, or I should say any nonignorable amount of, people suffering?
I start to understand why some people are crazy, oh, no, there is no "crazy" word in my dictionary. Some people behave differently with reasons. Are they wrong? No. Most of them are just misfortune and such misfortune almost swallows their souls and minds. They need more care to be back from the lost. I saw people speak to themselves as if they were giving a speech to the air. I saw people beg and fight in an extreme manner as if it's the end of the world. I saw people lie on the ground partially buried in rubbish with unfocused eyes lost in the fast moving crowds. I have no idea what kind of stories happened to them but my tears are making my sight to the future blur. I'm lost in finding a proper way to help them.
I talk to myself sometimes when I walk on the street alone. I fight like a loud nonstopping terrier sometimes when I am treated unfair or misunderstood. I feel helpless, wander around sleepless sometimes. I saw people suffer and people change. It's a way of self-protection to adapt to the unexpected life. To help, I first need to understand how it happens. “All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.” Poverty might be one reason but should not keep causing troubles and make bad things worse. To seek the root, I still believe every baby is born good in nature like an angle. As time goes by, the surroundings change and they mimic to adjust. First they see things happen and learn how things work. They try to repond in their natural way and here comes the education. They learn from others in their life without thinking deep initially but they may question and ask why. Tens of choices are given in every second and sometimes need instant responses. Mistakes happen and some are not reversible.
The importance lie in the learning process and thinking procedure. When solving problems and learning from others, give some time to try to figure out how comes the problem and why they react like that. Don't simply mimic others with the reasoning of "They just did like that and I just follow". You are you and you have the right to make your own choice. Before making decisions, try to learn about the possible consequences well and there are different soources of learning everywhere but pick your preference and enlarge your vision by expecting the unexpected. Think twice when make any response that allows thinking time. Be prepared for situations that request instant responses and think about how to respond in advance. Don't ignore the small things that might make a big difference. Changing from yourself is the first easiest thing before you want to change others or even the surroundings. Gradually impacts are made.
Up to now, i still think chaos follow an unknown pattern in its own way. Nobody could take full charge of it but if everyone makes a small move simultaneously, then we can figure out the pattern we wish. I start to think the tiny small things I could do and start doing it now. I'm slow and prefer working hard in a gradual pace. I start to think of all ancient Chinese sayings and renew my understandings of the world. History has a great magical power and I start to think about it carefully again. I need to learn the rules, study the rules and improve the rules.
I will never stop thinking as long as I'm alive and once I think it thoroughly, I will try every effort to turn it into actions.
My Memory
Back Hometown, China 07/17/2011
I am not a person good at expressing, sometimes even stubborn at my beliefs and refusing to accept some ideas no matter whether they are truth or not. However, I am a person with sensitivity and my emotion to who I love never comes less than others, which I would like to even exchange my life to the happiness of them. Now it is 3’o clock in the morning and I cannot fall asleep. My thoughts made me unable to control my tears from flowing down my cheek and wetting my hair and pillow. Strangely, I have never been so missing my grandparents and my memory of my childhood has been waken up… As I have been with my grandparents since I was a baby and for nearly ten years, I feel they are the ones most loving me and I love most besides my parents. I remember clearly that every vacation I was spending with them and enjoying a wonderful time in their house. At that time, they lived on a “hill” in my eyes and the 2-floor house was once built by the Japanese We lived in the first floor while my friends lived upstairs. There was a “big” garden in front of the house and that was my paradise in my childhood. There were two cherry trees, a peach tree and a “shelf” of grapes as well as some vegetables grown by my grandma. There was also a small swimming pool for me, which was the best place I’d like to stay in summer. In the garden, underground lied a basement for storing vegetables in winter and I used to put my little secrets there and share them with my friends upstairs. I really miss that place just as the feeling of Lu Xun to his BaiCaoYuan.
While the garden was my favorite my love to the house is more than that. Compared with my “BaiCaoYuan”, the inside rooms of the house were more like the “San Wei Shu Wu” of mine. My grandpa was an old man full of knowledge and experiences in my eyes at that time and he always told me some valuable principles and rules in life. As a little girl, I always cried for little things and my grandpa hated the crying noise made by my throat. He then became serious and angry which really made me afraid, however, he taught me to be strong and brave in his own way.
When asked what season I like, I will give the answer of winter without doubt. The reason I offered before was that I like whiteness and snow. But, think deeply, I guess the main reason lies in the house since Spring Festival is in winter and all my relatives got together in that house celebrating the coming new year. It is the warmness in the house compared with the cold weather outside that developed my strong love of winter and the relationship was so pure as to the snow, which left me an unforgettable memory I will cherish all my life.
I feel so sorry to my grandparents that the tears are now still around my eyes. The treasure they gave to me is worthless and I can not pay back for my whole life. “Sorry to grandma for I cannot realize my promise before your gone. Sorry to grandma that my time spending with you became less and less as I grow up. Sorry to grandma that I cannot bring you my happiness and progress in your life…” As I have been admitted by CUFE, my parents and I moved to Beijing. Time is flying away so quickly that it pushes me and refuses to let me stop to think. I have never gone back to my hometown since 2007 and I cannot imagine what it is like now. The memory of my childhood is becoming blur and seems dying away, which I once tried my best to figure it out. I’m missing the time spending with my grandparents playing cards according to the rules set up by my grandpa: if you cannot be the king, then choose to be the queen. I’m missing every walk after supper along the hills sharing jokes with their laughter. I’m missing the delicious dishes cooked by my grandma which made me feel satisfactory However, they disappeared suddenly with the collapse of the old house in my mind now, all gone with wind. “Sorry to grandpa that I always argue with you and make you angry. Sorry to grandpa that I didn't understand you at that time and always stood on the side of my grandma leaving you alone. Sorry to grandpa that I even did not see you last time before you passed away…” I regret not to say this to both of you leaving me crying all by myself now in my little room facing this cold machine. What I can say now is May God bless you two in the Heaven and live a happy life there.
I must accept I’m fearing for death. Gradually, my belief towards death has changed and life is just like a round trip in the universe. Everyone will die in the end but I believe the spirit will never die and will last forever. In my body lies their genes and I’ll pass on their spirit generation after generation. They never leave me alone. They are always looking at me and caring for my feelings. Hope they can feel my love,too.
Home is the warmest place in the world that it accepts you no matter how upset you are.Home always provides you a shelter to get away from the difficulties and bit sufferings. Home is the purest area for your heart to take a rest and get rid of the material world. Love your home, especially those still with you. They are the most expensive treasure you own and spend more time at home sharing your happiness and sorrow with them.
I never thought of these things before and when I began, I cannot stop my writing. There are so many things to memorize and every tiny detail is like the pupil grapes in my garden of old house. If given a choice to go back, I choose to go back home with no hesitation.
Now my wish is to give my parents what I can offer, even a warm hug when they are blue or a cup of tea when they are thirsty. Hope my grandparents can bless their children’s healthy and happy life. (08/20/2010)
While the garden was my favorite my love to the house is more than that. Compared with my “BaiCaoYuan”, the inside rooms of the house were more like the “San Wei Shu Wu” of mine. My grandpa was an old man full of knowledge and experiences in my eyes at that time and he always told me some valuable principles and rules in life. As a little girl, I always cried for little things and my grandpa hated the crying noise made by my throat. He then became serious and angry which really made me afraid, however, he taught me to be strong and brave in his own way.
When asked what season I like, I will give the answer of winter without doubt. The reason I offered before was that I like whiteness and snow. But, think deeply, I guess the main reason lies in the house since Spring Festival is in winter and all my relatives got together in that house celebrating the coming new year. It is the warmness in the house compared with the cold weather outside that developed my strong love of winter and the relationship was so pure as to the snow, which left me an unforgettable memory I will cherish all my life.
I feel so sorry to my grandparents that the tears are now still around my eyes. The treasure they gave to me is worthless and I can not pay back for my whole life. “Sorry to grandma for I cannot realize my promise before your gone. Sorry to grandma that my time spending with you became less and less as I grow up. Sorry to grandma that I cannot bring you my happiness and progress in your life…” As I have been admitted by CUFE, my parents and I moved to Beijing. Time is flying away so quickly that it pushes me and refuses to let me stop to think. I have never gone back to my hometown since 2007 and I cannot imagine what it is like now. The memory of my childhood is becoming blur and seems dying away, which I once tried my best to figure it out. I’m missing the time spending with my grandparents playing cards according to the rules set up by my grandpa: if you cannot be the king, then choose to be the queen. I’m missing every walk after supper along the hills sharing jokes with their laughter. I’m missing the delicious dishes cooked by my grandma which made me feel satisfactory However, they disappeared suddenly with the collapse of the old house in my mind now, all gone with wind. “Sorry to grandpa that I always argue with you and make you angry. Sorry to grandpa that I didn't understand you at that time and always stood on the side of my grandma leaving you alone. Sorry to grandpa that I even did not see you last time before you passed away…” I regret not to say this to both of you leaving me crying all by myself now in my little room facing this cold machine. What I can say now is May God bless you two in the Heaven and live a happy life there.
I must accept I’m fearing for death. Gradually, my belief towards death has changed and life is just like a round trip in the universe. Everyone will die in the end but I believe the spirit will never die and will last forever. In my body lies their genes and I’ll pass on their spirit generation after generation. They never leave me alone. They are always looking at me and caring for my feelings. Hope they can feel my love,too.
Home is the warmest place in the world that it accepts you no matter how upset you are.Home always provides you a shelter to get away from the difficulties and bit sufferings. Home is the purest area for your heart to take a rest and get rid of the material world. Love your home, especially those still with you. They are the most expensive treasure you own and spend more time at home sharing your happiness and sorrow with them.
I never thought of these things before and when I began, I cannot stop my writing. There are so many things to memorize and every tiny detail is like the pupil grapes in my garden of old house. If given a choice to go back, I choose to go back home with no hesitation.
Now my wish is to give my parents what I can offer, even a warm hug when they are blue or a cup of tea when they are thirsty. Hope my grandparents can bless their children’s healthy and happy life. (08/20/2010)
my attitude
chaos in the universe
SAY YES TO CHAOS
Chaos is defined as follows theoretically: Let V be a set. is said to be chaotic on V if f has sensitive dependence on the initial condition, f is topologically transitive and periodic points are dense in V. Chaos is everywhere, from the trend of the sea and the atmosphere to the water flowing in the pipe underground, from the increment and decline of the wild population to the beat of our human heart. Always, scientists try their best to simplify the world we live and give us theories and disciplines to make us in order regularly, however, things sometimes go in another way. Therefore I want to say yes to chaos loudly and let the chaos go itself naturally.
Have you ever thought of simplicity versus complexity? Which do you prefer? This problem always comes to my mind when the real world is not so satisfying and when I’m really puzzled about the real value of life. I can not say I find the answer but my understanding of it has been deepened after reading the book Chaos: Making a New Science written by James Gleick. For me it is a problem of contradiction and consistency and at first I think everything can be expressed simply in one or two words and I can make my life simple and easy. While the complexity of things arouses everyday and sometimes I found it hard to explain in a simple way, I came up with an idea that not everything is simple and in order naturally. It is we, human being that set up principles and constitutions to make it clear and regular, as well as complicated. My solution now is let it go naturally and optimistically and say yes to welcome every chaos you think and enjoy yourself!
I think science has two functions: one is to give proof to the real world and the other make predictions. Sometimes you will find it questionable that a theory good for proving the real world is bad for giving effective predictions of the future. That’s what the real world is so beautiful for and it still attracts scientists to dive themselves down into her. Think about what the world is if everything is predictable. Thanks to chaos, we have belief and curiosity to live and enjoy living.When I set up a mathematical or economic model, I always make a lot of assumptions to simplify the modal, which drives me apart from the real world. Though it is simple and avoids complexity which is so-called the good things we expect, it becomes useless and no more applications can be done without referring to the framework I built.
Chaos is natural and hard to modeling, which is a kind of beauty that attracts all of us. I’d like to be a strange attractor in a plane and meet with the specific initial conditions like the point my parents met each other. Look at the pictures of chaos: you will find the tail of a sea horse and waves in blue and red which is amazing and beautiful as a whole. How I wish to lie among the clouds and see every changes silently!
After seeing the film Chaos. Theory. I was impressed on the hero Camp Frank. In my eyes, he is a scientist and try to make everything in its order. What is the result? God seems to play jokes on him but in the end he succeeded and find the real value of the chaos. In the film, he spoke loudly “Say yes to whim! Say yes to chance! Say yes to chaos!”. What wonderful words full of philosophy!
I’d like to end my essay with an old saying in the Taoism by Laozi: The Way that can be told of is not an Unvarying Way;The names that can be named are not unvarying names.It was from the Nameless that Heaven and Earth sprang;The named is but the mother that rears the ten thousand creatures, each after its kind.
(this essay is written to welcome the new year and express my hope to the bright future in chaos! 12/31/2010)
Chaos is defined as follows theoretically: Let V be a set. is said to be chaotic on V if f has sensitive dependence on the initial condition, f is topologically transitive and periodic points are dense in V. Chaos is everywhere, from the trend of the sea and the atmosphere to the water flowing in the pipe underground, from the increment and decline of the wild population to the beat of our human heart. Always, scientists try their best to simplify the world we live and give us theories and disciplines to make us in order regularly, however, things sometimes go in another way. Therefore I want to say yes to chaos loudly and let the chaos go itself naturally.
Have you ever thought of simplicity versus complexity? Which do you prefer? This problem always comes to my mind when the real world is not so satisfying and when I’m really puzzled about the real value of life. I can not say I find the answer but my understanding of it has been deepened after reading the book Chaos: Making a New Science written by James Gleick. For me it is a problem of contradiction and consistency and at first I think everything can be expressed simply in one or two words and I can make my life simple and easy. While the complexity of things arouses everyday and sometimes I found it hard to explain in a simple way, I came up with an idea that not everything is simple and in order naturally. It is we, human being that set up principles and constitutions to make it clear and regular, as well as complicated. My solution now is let it go naturally and optimistically and say yes to welcome every chaos you think and enjoy yourself!
I think science has two functions: one is to give proof to the real world and the other make predictions. Sometimes you will find it questionable that a theory good for proving the real world is bad for giving effective predictions of the future. That’s what the real world is so beautiful for and it still attracts scientists to dive themselves down into her. Think about what the world is if everything is predictable. Thanks to chaos, we have belief and curiosity to live and enjoy living.When I set up a mathematical or economic model, I always make a lot of assumptions to simplify the modal, which drives me apart from the real world. Though it is simple and avoids complexity which is so-called the good things we expect, it becomes useless and no more applications can be done without referring to the framework I built.
Chaos is natural and hard to modeling, which is a kind of beauty that attracts all of us. I’d like to be a strange attractor in a plane and meet with the specific initial conditions like the point my parents met each other. Look at the pictures of chaos: you will find the tail of a sea horse and waves in blue and red which is amazing and beautiful as a whole. How I wish to lie among the clouds and see every changes silently!
After seeing the film Chaos. Theory. I was impressed on the hero Camp Frank. In my eyes, he is a scientist and try to make everything in its order. What is the result? God seems to play jokes on him but in the end he succeeded and find the real value of the chaos. In the film, he spoke loudly “Say yes to whim! Say yes to chance! Say yes to chaos!”. What wonderful words full of philosophy!
I’d like to end my essay with an old saying in the Taoism by Laozi: The Way that can be told of is not an Unvarying Way;The names that can be named are not unvarying names.It was from the Nameless that Heaven and Earth sprang;The named is but the mother that rears the ten thousand creatures, each after its kind.
(this essay is written to welcome the new year and express my hope to the bright future in chaos! 12/31/2010)
My Gratitude
Central Park, New York 01/01/12
Before talking about myself, I appreciate the great support of my motherland--China, Central University of Finance and Economics, China Economics and Management Academy, my instructors and professors, friends and classmates, my parents and families. Without your encouragement and considerate help, I cannot go through the hardest time I have ever suffered. Thanks to CSC, I can realize my dream to go to one of the greatest department in economics in the world. Thanks to CUFE, my undergraduate study would be an unforgettable memory I cherish forever. Thanks to CEMA, these 4 years’ access to the most advanced area in economics and mathematics is key to building up my value of life. Thanks to all professors and my instructors, you guide me to a wonderful world and I will follow your pace spreading your spirit. Thanks to my friends and classmates, our share of happiness and sorrow, anxiety and worry makes me move on. Thanks to my father and mother and families. I am grateful to everyone in my life and thank you all!
I have decided to go abroad for further study at my 19th birthday. The initial idea is simple---to see the outside world. I attended the GRE classes in the first term of 2009-2010 and took part in National Competition of Mathematical Modelling, American CMM in the Spring Festival of 2010. We won the second prize which made me firm in my belief of the future. I took GRE general on June 12, 2010. My score is Q800 A430 AW4.0. TOEFL iBT on September 12, 2010. 101 in total (W:28, R:27, S:23, L:23). GRE sub in mathematics 770/900. My GPA is 3.95/4.50. I started my application in October and I only apply to universities in US. There are some universities offering application fee waiver. But in my eyes they would pay less attention to those who did not pay the application fee. I have got 5 admissions and offers. However, I decided to go to Boston University since the program I join ranked high in US and the department of economics at BU ranked 7 in publications tying with Yale and before Stanford and Berkeley.
The only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. My initial idea to see the outside world has changed through the application process and having a sense of purpose and striving towards goals is much more important. So please think carefully about your dream and then keep “stubborn” on it.
"Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Never lose focus. Whatever you do, think about what you really value. If you’re going to work for someone else, the time you spend understanding your values will help you find the right kind of company or institution to work for, and when you find it, to do a better job."
"Don’t be afraid to think big. Business author Jim Collins says that great companies have “big hairy audacious goals”. Google’s motto, “access to all the world’s information” is an example of such a goal. Don’t be afraid to fail. There’s a wonderful poem by Rainer Maria Rilke that talks about the biblical story of Jacob wrestling with an angel, being defeated, but coming away stronger from the fight. It ends with an exhortation that goes something like this: ”What we fight with is so small, and when we win, it makes us small. What we want is to be defeated, decisively, by successively greater things.”"
"Create more value than you capture. Take the long view. It’s very easy to make local optimizations, but they eventually catch up with you. Our economy has many elements of a Ponzi Scheme. We borrow from other countries to finance our consumption; we borrow from our children by saddling them with debt and using up non-renewable resources."
It’s hard to see beyond the small here and the short now, especially if you live in a favored place and time. That’s why so many of the really important things do end up on the plates of non-profits. That’s why a time like this, when the bubble is bursting, is a great time to see how important it is to think about the big picture, and what matters not just to us, but to building a sustainable economy in a sustainable world.
I think everybody has a special way and my specific case may not suit others. Yet the core idea lies in the words above and I really hope it may help you think more deeply on the application. There is a long time waiting for the results and I suggest you to do more practice to find what your love lies.
In addition, the most important thing in the application might not lie in the scores. So do not lose confidence and more communication with professors can help you find your own way. I listened to lectures by foreign professors and attended some international conferences. Through this process, I grew up more quickly and made friends from all over the world. I met a professor from Italy who told me the most important thing is to meet the group of people in your interested area. Also, a French professor helped me a lot on my personal statement. There are so many resources around you that if you truly pay attention, you will find them!
(06/12/2011)
I have decided to go abroad for further study at my 19th birthday. The initial idea is simple---to see the outside world. I attended the GRE classes in the first term of 2009-2010 and took part in National Competition of Mathematical Modelling, American CMM in the Spring Festival of 2010. We won the second prize which made me firm in my belief of the future. I took GRE general on June 12, 2010. My score is Q800 A430 AW4.0. TOEFL iBT on September 12, 2010. 101 in total (W:28, R:27, S:23, L:23). GRE sub in mathematics 770/900. My GPA is 3.95/4.50. I started my application in October and I only apply to universities in US. There are some universities offering application fee waiver. But in my eyes they would pay less attention to those who did not pay the application fee. I have got 5 admissions and offers. However, I decided to go to Boston University since the program I join ranked high in US and the department of economics at BU ranked 7 in publications tying with Yale and before Stanford and Berkeley.
The only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. My initial idea to see the outside world has changed through the application process and having a sense of purpose and striving towards goals is much more important. So please think carefully about your dream and then keep “stubborn” on it.
"Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Never lose focus. Whatever you do, think about what you really value. If you’re going to work for someone else, the time you spend understanding your values will help you find the right kind of company or institution to work for, and when you find it, to do a better job."
"Don’t be afraid to think big. Business author Jim Collins says that great companies have “big hairy audacious goals”. Google’s motto, “access to all the world’s information” is an example of such a goal. Don’t be afraid to fail. There’s a wonderful poem by Rainer Maria Rilke that talks about the biblical story of Jacob wrestling with an angel, being defeated, but coming away stronger from the fight. It ends with an exhortation that goes something like this: ”What we fight with is so small, and when we win, it makes us small. What we want is to be defeated, decisively, by successively greater things.”"
"Create more value than you capture. Take the long view. It’s very easy to make local optimizations, but they eventually catch up with you. Our economy has many elements of a Ponzi Scheme. We borrow from other countries to finance our consumption; we borrow from our children by saddling them with debt and using up non-renewable resources."
It’s hard to see beyond the small here and the short now, especially if you live in a favored place and time. That’s why so many of the really important things do end up on the plates of non-profits. That’s why a time like this, when the bubble is bursting, is a great time to see how important it is to think about the big picture, and what matters not just to us, but to building a sustainable economy in a sustainable world.
I think everybody has a special way and my specific case may not suit others. Yet the core idea lies in the words above and I really hope it may help you think more deeply on the application. There is a long time waiting for the results and I suggest you to do more practice to find what your love lies.
In addition, the most important thing in the application might not lie in the scores. So do not lose confidence and more communication with professors can help you find your own way. I listened to lectures by foreign professors and attended some international conferences. Through this process, I grew up more quickly and made friends from all over the world. I met a professor from Italy who told me the most important thing is to meet the group of people in your interested area. Also, a French professor helped me a lot on my personal statement. There are so many resources around you that if you truly pay attention, you will find them!
(06/12/2011)
My Belief
I believe in love and have faith of its great power in changing life. Life is so short that I try every efforts to love everybody, by all means do good, help a hand whenever I can and make my tiny contribution to the evolvement of the world.
I believe everyone has a choice of life while I make my belief following my heart. I would not choose "An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth". I would not fully support "No pains, no gains". I would regard freedom not as the right to do what we please, but as the opportunity to do what is right. I would admit I know nothing and keep wondering with curiosity. I would be genuine and simple to life though I understand its uncertainty and complexity.
I believe in fairy tales, like there is a little princess living in my heart. I believe in miracles, like tomorrow is another day. I believe in nature, like there is tongues in trees, books in the running brooks, sermons in stones and good in everything. I believe in adventure, like romance should last a lifetime.
I believe the power of faith can make dreams come true. I believe knowledge and science can help understand the truth. I believe being strong can overcome any hard times. I believe smile can heal any wound. I believe every effort counts. I believe ...
I believe, I dream, I plan, I do.
(02/14/2014)
I believe everyone has a choice of life while I make my belief following my heart. I would not choose "An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth". I would not fully support "No pains, no gains". I would regard freedom not as the right to do what we please, but as the opportunity to do what is right. I would admit I know nothing and keep wondering with curiosity. I would be genuine and simple to life though I understand its uncertainty and complexity.
I believe in fairy tales, like there is a little princess living in my heart. I believe in miracles, like tomorrow is another day. I believe in nature, like there is tongues in trees, books in the running brooks, sermons in stones and good in everything. I believe in adventure, like romance should last a lifetime.
I believe the power of faith can make dreams come true. I believe knowledge and science can help understand the truth. I believe being strong can overcome any hard times. I believe smile can heal any wound. I believe every effort counts. I believe ...
I believe, I dream, I plan, I do.
(02/14/2014)
My courage
Give me a place to stand and I will move the Earth! ---Archimedes
Brave to learn, to love, to embrace the world.
Ready for new journeys!
Brave to learn, to love, to embrace the world.
Ready for new journeys!